I often mention, on this page, the benefits of voluntary work. Apart from doing good it also does good to the volunteer and is an especially good way of staving off loneliness and meeting like-minded people doing what interests you.

Voluntary work is, well, free. Unless you are a corporate group wishing to do good in the neighbourhood - and perhaps a bit of 'team building'. Evidently the group accepting volunteers, who have taken a day off work, ask for up to £30 per person. And finding a company which would like to make use of voluntary labour is not that simple.

I thought this very unfair until I thought further: The corporate group will make certain there is publicity surrounding their work as, of course, will the group employing them - not the right word in the circumstances I guess – the group which is having work done. Possibly some of the more unpleasant jobs on their 'to do' list will be suitable for volunteers. It is probably similar to employing a 'temp' in the office temporarily taking over from someone absent.

Half their first day will be spent teaching them what is required and the other half of the day will be taken in correcting what they have done. Thus employing a group of volunteers will also require someone to explain the work to them and probably oversee them. Of course volunteers may be so taken by the work that they decide to do more voluntary work off their own bat.

I have been talking to someone trying to organise such a group visit for her company's employees. She reports that her company have given the green light on the £30 each for the volunteering at Horsell Preservation Society - building bird boxes and maybe clearing scrub. So the company would pay for it and give employees a paid day off to do the work.

The Basingstoke Canal Society want £500 from the group and in return - 'During a corporate working party day, the activities your team can contribute to include painting locks/bridges, pathway repairs, teak oiling benches, litter picking, clearing vegetation and graffiti removal - some of the tasks can be carried out either from the towpath or from a working boat'.

That sounds like some very interesting work. My contact's company has said if she can get at least 17 people to do this (so 17 x £30 = £510) they would also cover the £500 cost.

Some good physical work in the fresh air away from those screens – and the knowledge you are doing some real good. My contact, who has been on previous corporate volunteering days, highly recommends it!

Last week's front page was rather satisfying: names were mentioned, amounts of dosh were mentioned, The Financial Reporting Council (FRC) has confided it is “looking into the professional standards” of two individual accountants” in respect of the Council' operations and investment activities for the financial years ended 31 March 2017 to 31 March 2023.

I said “rather satisfying” but I did feel that well-known cliche coming on - “Too little, too late.”

Further on I was disappointed to read “The FRC's powers of sanction range from issuing unlimited fines to a slap on the wrist.” It can also strip people of their membership of professional bodies. Given the natures of the two named people I assume this might mean being struck off as an accountant – but I'm sure they can keep their Golf Club memberships etc by some other name.

I tried to find out what happens to an accountant who is struck off but the answer was, unsurprisingly, full of legal jargon. Well, it was to me. I had hoped for some public humiliation - breaking of swords, ripping insignia from gowns. Surely we could bring back the stocks for such behaviour? Is there any better way of giving a show of humility before the wronged parties?

One worrying fact offered to me by a real accountant, is that anyone can call themselves an accountant. So I guess it is up to the real accountants: Institute of Chartered Accountants and The Association of Certified Accountants & Corporate Accountants to check their records and, perhaps, ceremoniously rip up any pertinent certificates. Personally I'd still like the stocks brought back.

I had a reader contact me to ask if I knew anything about the best types of paint for graffiti work. Must be bright and weather proof. He was hoping to name and shame those who put self before others knowing that his work would be read by more people than those who read my page. Perhaps he might paint his feelings on the side of the Hilton – it would seem there is often convenient scaffolding at the site. The powers that be - if any are left – will be so disgusted that any resident should dare to declare their feelings so publicly that his words will be scrubbed off at once and those panels nailed into place with something more substantial than has previously been used.

I had to visit my GP on the south side of Woking. Not a million miles away. In my walking days I could have done it in twenty minutes or so. But I was driving. Having a daughter working in Woking town I knew of Goldsworth Road hold ups. Indeed a bulletin from the council mentioned the Victoria Arch and Goldsworth Road closures which are adding to Woking’s traffic chaos. The closure is due to a water mains leak affecting the gas network. Both Southern Gas Networks and Affinity Water are on-site to resolve this major issue, which has impacted over 350 local residents. The work is likely to continue into next week. The route recommended takes traffic up Triggs Lane. Where there are now traffic lights. I had allowed three-quarters of an hour for the journey. I needed most of that time.

There are small joys to be had in these slow moving or even stationary queues: you can look along people's driveways and glimpse houses you scarcely knew existed because when the traffic is moving as it should you cannot take our eyes from the road to admire such things. And I like to read house names, and wonder at some of their sources. I know that some homes would be named for the place where the owners spent their honeymoon. Over the years the house was demolished and a small group of houses built in its place, bearing the name of some Swiss ski resort to the wonderment of the current dwellers.

There is another unforeseen benefit of the traffic being forced to move so slowly: the potholes do less damage. Now half term is over the traffic will get worse. Ann-Marie Barker, Leader of the council, acknowledges this fact in one of her many statements. She also reports that “Sir Robert McAlpine (SRM) has continued to make steady progress this week, completing the installation of temporary fixings to all ‘high risk’ panels. This is thanks to the arrival of a large crane (known as a Bronto) on site, providing engineers with the safest and quickest means of installing fixings. She also reports that Sir Robert McAlpine (SRM) has continued to make steady progress this week, completing the installation of temporary fixings to all ‘high risk’ panels.

This is thanks to the arrival of a large crane (known as a Bronto) on site, providing engineers with the safest and quickest means of installing fixings.” I've not seen this Bronto but presume it is named for the Brontosaurus – a dinosaur and therefore not giving great confidence to those of us who have suffered for so long through shoddy workmanship. And what is meant by 'temporary fixings' – surely we have had enough of 'temporary.' Although, looking around Woking, it would seem anything over about 20 years of age may be termed temporary and may therefore be pulled down.

Her report continues: “SRM has appointed a team of independent industry leading façade design specialists that are reviewing why this cladding has failed and whether there is a bespoke solution. I hope to bring you updates on these early discussions as investigations continue.”

My thought is that such specialists should have been on hand at the beginning of this chaos. I think the use of the word 'facade' is correct in this instance; it can mean a false appearance especially on the front of a large building, giving it a deceptive appearance of something which it is not.

Regular readers of my column will know I enjoy the combination of bonhomie and brainstorming at Horsell's Crown Pub Quiz every Wednesday. Other pub quizzes are available (and equally as good, I am sure) throughout the borough, but The Crown is unusual in one respect - it does not "buy in" weekly sets of questions. Instead its quiz master Ian Mclaughlin has researched and written 75 of his own for well over a decade now, which is no mean feat, and much appreciated by all. He and several competing participants, noticing my sudden absence due to a post-cancer hiccup in health, sent their most kind best wishes via my team-mates, and I hope to resume my usual order for a "half of Horsell Gold" soon.

Meanwhile, one cheerful opponent, a good acquaintance but a non-newspaper reader, also sent their heartfelt apologies for having been unaware until now of my 2024 cancer treatment. One of my team-mates responded: "Don't you buy the News & Mail? Ann will forgive you for not knowing about her treatment, but she'll castigate you for not reading her columns!"

Elsewhere, my surely slight reputation as an ardent quiz-team lover seems to be curiously growing somewhat. After two annual February day-trips with team-mates to Maldon in Essex, for a fundraising quiz in support of the town's 17th century Thomas Plume Library of rare books, I was unable to travel the distance this year. Its questions were set by Frank Garcia, who grew up in Horsell but now teaches Latin grammar at King Edward's Grammar School in Chelmsford.

I am told several Essex people enquired about me. "Ah yes - you're from Woking. I hear your friend Ann is unwell this year - do give her our best wishes", said one.

"I'm sorry that I'm glad to hear she's unwell..." said another, optimistic of doing well in my stead but kindly meant and humorously received.

As for the quiz itself, my depleted teamsters (just two from Horsell and four from Essex) somehow managed to win by a single point.

In a round of 10 questions connected to D-Day they knew the name of Hengist's brother Horsa (the pair led the first Anglo-Saxon settlers in Britain,) but failed to make the connection with the Horsa gliders used in the Normandy landings. But they knew the name of the portable harbours designed mainly by Welsh civil engineer Hugh Iorys Hughes - Mulberry harbours.

Perhaps the one-point win was achieved by knowing the harbours were assembled, operated and maintained by Royal Engineers under the guidance of civil engineer Reginald D. Gwyther, who lived at Dalmahoy on Kettlewell Hill in Horsell. When he died in 1965, the garden of his house was sold off to enable development of two new houses in a cul-de-sac - Mulberry Close, named as a mark of respect.

The Plume Quiz prize was a bottle of wine each, one of which has been donated to me! I shall drink it when the sun shines, raising one glass to R.D. Gwyther and another to all who enjoy Woking borough's many and various pub quizzes.